


Make Me A Match

by LollyHolly99



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Kissing, M/M, Other, Post Pacifist Ending, Reader-Insert, Sans and Reader are besties, baby's first fic kinda, eventually, lil bit of Papyton in there, shipper Papyrus, what the frick do i tag oh god
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-24
Updated: 2016-11-27
Packaged: 2018-08-10 19:02:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7857388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LollyHolly99/pseuds/LollyHolly99
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Papyrus thinks you and Sans should get together. The problem is, neither of you are interested. Whoops.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. It Begins

**Author's Note:**

> what the hell am i doing

“Wait, what?” You stood, bewildered, facing a delighted Papyrus at your front door.

He sighed. “I shall repeat myself so that you may understand me. Would you be interested in courting my brother? Would you please date him?”

His words took a few seconds to sink in before you responded. “Is Sans really so lazy that he has to send his brother to ask me out instead of coming up here himself?"

“No, no, no, human! I have come here completely of my own accord! Asking you to be his datemate was completely my idea!” Papyrus said proudly.

“...Papyrus, what the fuck.”

“Language, human! And as to your question, it is very simple! Sans doesn't get out enough, especially after coming to the surface. I believe a romantic partner may be just what he needs to start... stopping being such a lazybones!”

“Okay, okay, but why me?”

“That, too, is a simple question to answer! I have done a lot of dedicated research these past few days, and made plenty of very good observations, and through my efforts I came to the conclusion that you are the ideal datemate for my brother! You will surely be beneficial for both his mental and physical health!”

You could only manage to stare at Papyrus confusedly. “And what exactly made you come to that conclusion?”

“Well, I can't list off the gargantuan list of reasons off of the top of my head, but I assure you, there are many reasons. Many very good reasons. If you want, I can go home and get the notebook I wrote them all down in and show y-“ He turned as though pre-emptively leaving to get the book, but you grabbed his arm and stopped him before interrupting.

“No, Papyrus, that's fine, you don't have to do that.”

“Oh, good! So, will you do it?”

You sighed. It was hard saying no to that face, but you had to do it. “I'm sorry, Pap, but I'm just not interested in Sans that way. And I'm pretty sure he feels the same about me. We're just really good friends. That's all. You're gonna have to find someone else to get that guy off his bony butt.” He looked severely disappointed, and boy did it hurt to see Papyrus frowning as he was. But you weren't interested, and you had shit to get back to! “But hey, good on you for trying to help your bro out. I'm sure he'd appreciate what you're doing for him. Now, I really have to go, so, uh, I'll see you later, Paps!” you hurriedly closed the door and tried to avoid looking at that saddened face again, and as you turned away from the door to walk off, you heard Papyrus one last time.

“But I dedicated a whole wall of my room to figuring out the perfect match for Sans! And I disregarded any other possible suitors because I was so sure you would accept! Now Sans and I are datemate-less! Why would you let this tragedy befall us, human?!”

You couldn't suppress the giggle that came from you at Papyrus’ antics. Oh, that skeleton.

Sitting down at your computer, you opened your chat window again.

[hey Alphys, I’m back]

{Hi!}

{Who was it?}

{At the door, I mean}

[Papyrus. he was asking me to go out with Sans]

[lmao]

{Wait, Sans likes you?}

[no, I guess Pap just thought that if Sans had a datemate (me specifically) then he'd get up off his ass once in a while haha]

{...}

{...I ship it}

[NO YOU STOP THAT]

[I'M NOT INTO HIM LIKE THA T N O]

{Hehehe}

[ALPHYS ~HOW COULD YOU~]

{Sorry, I just got this sudden image of you two in my head for a moment}

[DESTROY the thought]

{You'd probably be really cute!}

[nNNOOOO we’re just frieeeeendsssssss!!!!!]

[also not as cute as you and Undyne for sure]

{!!!!!!!}

[haha]

[but yeah no Sans and me is not a thing that's happening and you need to stop]

{Ok ;)}

[don't you winky face at me]

{Hehehe}

{Are you sure it's not happening?}

[as sure as you are yellow]

{...}

{What if I}

{Dumped a bucket of purple paint over myself or something}

[Alphys stop no]

{Heehee}

[no paint]

{Yes paint}

[I'm out I'm not dealing w/ this anymore goodbye]

{Nooooo wait come back!!}

[nope I'm gone]

[I'm going]

{:(}

[to go get some lunch and then I'll be back]

{:D}

[and then we can play video games or whatever]

{Sounds good!}

* * *

Thankfully, neither Papyrus nor Alphys hounded you about Sans for the entire afternoon. The entire evening, too. You were thankful for that.

You got to sleep peacefully that night, any thoughts of this whole Sans situation having disappeared from your mind.

By the next morning, you had entirely forgotten about any skeleton-related conversation. Things were good. For the whole day, nothing was brought up again about a potential relationship between you and Sans.

Had you remembered Papyrus' proposal from the day before, you would have said something along the lines of "Thank god that's over" to yourself, and hoped Papyrus was successful in finding the right match for Sans.

Sans.

Your friend.

And nothing more.


	2. Anime Night & A Sleepover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone sleeps round Alphys and Undyne's place after anime night and Sans finds out what his brother's been up to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so there was WAY more positive reaction to ch1 than I expected and since this chapter was already like, halfway done, I got my ass in gear and here it is!!! the (kind of) awaited chapter 2!!! also I'm continually gonna be asking for forgiveness throughout all the chapters in all my writing bc that's just how I am but hey. ty guys for the support.
> 
>  
> 
> (now watch as this ends up being the most frequent I will ever be with posting fics lmao. this'll be... a treat. yeah let's call it that. bc i feel good. hopefully I don't leave huge gaps of time between updates after this. I'll try, friends.)  
> (doesn't help that school's about to start HAHAhaha...ha....)

A week since Papyrus visited your place in hopes of getting you to date his brother, Alphys had invited the gang (the gang apparently being you, Undyne, Alphys, Sans, Papyrus, and Frisk) over to her and Undyne’s house to watch anime. The two had been getting really into Studio Ghibli’s movies, despite them not being their usual anime ventures, and couldn't wait to share this new film they'd found – Spirited Away.

It turned out the couple were not prepared in the slightest for the evening, so there was going to be at least a good 20 minutes of Sans and Undyne going to the store to buy snacks and your hosts preparing said snacks when they returned.

So it was you, Frisk, Alphys and Papyrus until they got back.

You were sat on the couch with Papyrus and Frisk, who were playing some hand clappy game, while Alphys read the backs of the dvd boxes in the Ghibli pile by the tv.

“Human, if I may be so bold...” you turned and looked at Papyrus, who was somehow still playing the clap game perfectly, and hoped things wouldn't immediately go bad considering the last time you had seen him. 

“...I would like to ask again, in case you have changed your mind in the past week, would you please date my brother?”

Things had immediately gone bad.

“N-no, Papyrus.” You said, blushing. “My answer and reasons are exactly the same. I'm not interested. So could you please stop bringing this up, especially with others around?” You tried to tell him as bluntly, but politely as possible. He nodded in understanding.

“Alright then. I suppose I shall have to spend another few days working on finding him the second best partner.”

You tried to immerse yourself in a game on your phone to make the time until you weren't alone with the guy who was so excited about the prospect of you dating his brother go faster, but a certain little someone had been listening intently to your conversation.

“Are you gonna kiss uncle Sans?” signed Frisk, pausing the game with Papyrus.

“No, not you too!” you cried exasperatedly, and a little over-dramatically. “First Papyrus, then Alphys, and now you, Frisk!”

“Did someone say my name?” Alphys piped up, broken out of the trance apparently caused by the blurb for Ponyo.

“Hm? Alphys? Have you been discussing a relationship between my brother and the taller human friend as well?”

“Oh my god, no.” You said, dropping your head into your hands.

It was a painful few minutes of the two discussing how great you'd be together, with Papyrus voicing his regret of not bringing that notebook again, until Sans and Undyne returned from the store. The sound of the front door opening was like music to your ears. They managed to shut up about the whole thing with Sans in the house.

Soon enough, the popcorn and chips were set out on the table and the lights were turned off for optimum movie watching, and the film began.

Frisk liked Chihiro from the start. They seemed to be quite fond of the character. They pulled back their hair like Chihiro’s was tied up, and signed something about kids wearing striped shirts. Huh, who knew that this child that ended up in a strange, unknown, magical world, and went on an adventure to find their way home, making lots of friends along the way, would feel relatable to Frisk.

Sans, who usually only ever had that big old grin on his face, looked ever so slightly put off by No-Face, for reasons you didn't know. Maybe it was just because he looked creepy? He kind of did, especially during that rampage through the bath house chasing after Chihiro. But it was weird to see that sliver of uncomfortableness in Sans, however understandable it was. Nobody seemed to notice, and it didn't seem to affect him too badly, so you kept quiet about it.

The movie was great, as you remembered it, and everyone else agreed. By the end of the film, a few episodes of a series you'd started together many weeks ago, and the post-anime-evening shenanigans, it had gotten a lot later than expected, and the girls invited you all to stay the night. Everyone took up the offer – you were all pretty tired, and just thinking about the effort of going home was awful. And you all knew how good the pancakes you knew Alphys would be making in the morning were, but that was just an added bonus that the lack of effort would bring.

Frisk was picked up by Toriel soon enough, and sleeping arrangements were being sorted.

“So, there's five of us, but we only have one bedroom, and that's mine and Alphys’, sooo...” Undyne looked into the distance, deep in thought, for just a moment. Her good eye practically lit up when she figured out what to do. “How do you guys feel about sleeping in here? We've got enough sleeping bags for all of you, and there's even the couch if anyone wants it bad enough.”

You, Sans and Papyrus found yourselves on Alphys and Undyne’s living room floor in comfy sleeping bags, drifting off to sleep after you and Sans had subjected the larger skeleton to a multitude of bad puns that he let out pained groans at.

* * *

 

If you dreamt anything that night, you didn't recall it in the morning. The first thing you were aware of was something touching your hand.

When you looked at said hand, you found it was entangled with Sans’ hand, connected to his sleeping form, sprawled out in the sleeping bag next to you.

You pulled your hand away slowly so you wouldn't wake him, unfortunately failing in your efforts.

 _Shit, isn't he supposed to be a super heavy sleeper?_ you thought as he jostled slightly in the sleeping bag.

He mumbled something as he came into consciousness, trying to roll over but having to stop as his arm stopped moving with him, attached to yours. His eyes opened slowly to reveal his empty sockets and those small pinpricks of white that made their way over to his unmoving limb. He looked at your hands, then at your face, then your hands again, before smiling his familiar smile.

“Y’know, if you needed me to give you a hand, you could've just asked.”

You chuckled at his joke before trying to explain yourself. “No, man, as dumb as it sounds, I woke up like this. No joke.”

“No jokes? No can do, amigo. You know me. Too many funny bones in this skeleton.”

“Okay, okay, shut up, man.” you said, giggling again.

“Cool. So, uh, can I have my hand back?”

You recoiled a little at his words and quickly untangled your fingers from his own.

“Man, I bet Papyrus did this in our sleep to try and convince me again.”

“Yeah.” Sans responded simply, barely registering what you were saying as he tried to drift off to sleep again.

“Hmm... But then again, Pap wouldn't do something like this... I asked him to stop, and knowing Papyrus, he would absolutely stop at that.”

“...Hold up, what's this about my brother and convincing you?” said Sans as your words finally clicked in his mind.

“Oh, your brother's been trying to get me to go out with you. He thinks I'll... get you more active, or something. Joke’s on him, the most exercise I get is walking to the kitchen and back for food."

“Wait, really?” asked Sans, his eyes widening as he sat up to look at you.

You lay back down and stared at the ceiling. “I mean, no, I go for walks sometimes. It's just an exaggeration-”

“No, no, no, I mean the Papyrus bit." Sans interrupted. "He wants us to go out?”

"Uh, yeah." you responded. "He came to my house last week to try and get me to... 'court' you, or whatever."

Sans was silent for a moment.

"Well, uh, wow." He flopped back down again onto his pillow. "He knows we're just friends, right?"

"I keep telling him, but who knows? Maybe when he wakes up he'll decide not to find someone else and insist on trying to set us up together."

"Heh, I wouldn't put it past him." He paused. "...Would've been nice if he'd told me about his little attempt at playing matchmaker."

You thought for a second. "Maybe he wanted it to be a surprise? Like, maybe he thought if you knew he was trying to find you a datemate, you'd turn everyone down like some kind of... reverse psychology thing? So he got me to ask you out and you'd think it came from me, and not some theoretical thing that apparently covered an entire wall of his room, and... eh, I don't know."

"I mean, it's plausible."

"Yeah, or maybe it's just Papyrus being Papyrus."

"That's also plausible."

"Yeah...So, anyway, you're not interested, right?" you asked, deciding to just rip the plaster off in one go and know for sure rather than dance around the topic.

"Uh, no, yeah, no, I'm not really into it. You're cool and all, but I'd rather stay friends."

"Thank god." you sighed, relieved. "I didn't want things to get weird between us or anything."

"I wouldn't want that either." He smiled and held out a fist, which you promptly bumped.

"So it's all good?"

"Yep. All good."

"And we'll deal with Pap when he wakes up, I suppose."

"I'm surprised he's not awake already." he said, as you both turned your heads to see the sleeping skeleton.

"Yeah, isn't he like, the earliest of early birds? Morning jog and everything?"

"Mhm. And to remedy this weird situation in which I'm up before him, I'm gonna take a little nap. Nighty night, amigo." Sans snuggled into the sleeping bag and closed his eyes."

"Sans, it's not even nighttime. You can see the sun through the curta-" You were interrupted by snoring. Sans was already asleep. You shook your head and chuckled to yourself before deciding to leave him to it.

You stayed in the sleeping bag for a good few minutes, thinking about things. Nothing significant. Chicken nuggets, mostly. Eventually, the house awoke, one by one. Papyrus, then Undyne, then Alphys, then Sans, after much nagging from his brother.

Alphys got to work on the pancakes you all hoped were coming, the smell of them quickly filling the house and making you all hungry and prepared for the fluffy piles of pancakes you'd soon get on your plates. Undyne helped with the cooking - with Alphys letting her help much as you would let a small child help with cooking, knowing Undyne's habit with kitchens.

You were left on the sofa, playing a card game with Papyrus while Sans snoozed in the corner.

"So, Papyrus," you began, setting down your cards. "You wouldn't happen to have done anything with my hand and Sans' hand while we were sleeping, would you?"

Papyrus simply looked puzzled. "Pardon me?"

"We're not interested in a relationship, Paps. This has to stop."

"I don't understand."

"Dude, you've been trying to get me and Sans together for the past week. This morning, Sans and I woke up holding hands. Come on, Pap, I might not be Einstein, but I can put two and two together."

"Pancakes are done! Come and get 'em!" Undyne called from the kitchen.

At that moment, Sans woke up - most likely due to Undyne's booming voice - and made his way to the kitchen while you and Papyrus packed away the deck of cards.

The trio in the other room were wrapped up in a conversation - about what, you didn't hear.

"I don't know what you're talking about, human." he told you as you both walked through to the kitchen table and took your seats in front of the syrup-covered breakfasts. And you could tell Papyrus wasn't lying. Papyrus rarely lied.

"I had nothing to do with whatever hand-holding incident occurred last night."

Your mind was caught up in his words for the rest of the meal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope u guys like it as much as/better than ch1  
> also hope the 2000 word count makes up for the short ass 800 word ch1  
> *runs off and buries myself in the woods, never to be seen again*


	3. (Not So) Blind Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Papyrus sets you up on a blind date. Take a guess at who your date is for tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the most writing I've done in a LONG time holy heck u guys  
> like 4 real I'm super motivated to get this fic done for everyone (hopefully school starting in less than a week won't destroy my writing flow. fingers crossed.)  
> updates will probably be less super frequent than they've been so far? but I'm frickin DETERMINED to get this thing done so I'll be trying guys  
> <3

When Papyrus set you up on a blind date, there was no doubt in your mind what was happening. Especially when you spoke to Sans and he told you his brother had set him up on a blind date, too.

Apparently the "sleepy-hand-holding incident" a few days ago had inspired Papyrus to go ahead once more with his initial plan of getting you and Sans together, despite both of you explaining to him that it's not happening. God, you wished you'd never brought it up with him.

Dinner and a movie, he'd told you. Not at a restaurant and a cinema, as you might've thought without his explanation, no - at his and Sans' house. After recently watching a very educational cartoon film about dogs, he learned that spaghetti is the most romantic food. And he loved spaghetti! And loved cooking it! It only made sense to be your personal chef for the evening!

The movie that Papyrus picked out for after the meal would surely only add to the romance. A little film called "Cars" he had come across just that morning. His bed was a car, and according to what he had heard in the past, there was apparently something about beds that was romantic... Yes. The links made perfect sense. This was going to be brilliant.

The date had been damn near forced on you. You agreed to go, if only to get Papyrus to stop complaining about the effort he'd put into organizing the thing going to waste. There was also the bonus of hanging out with Sans, whatever atmosphere Papyrus tried to make for you two. And maybe this would be what would eventually cause Pap to realise neither of you were interested in eachother. Fingers crossed.

You arrived at the skelebros' house at the arranged time in some casual clothes. Jeans and a t-shirt; it wasn't like this was a real date or anything, just hanging out with a friend, as far as you were concerned. When Papyrus answered the door, he seemed slightly offended by your attire, sighing "Surely you have something in your wardrobe that is more suitable for a date like this? Never mind, come on in."

The lights had been replaced with candles throughout the ground floor of the house, creating a calm ambiance that swept over you as Papyrus led you to the newly added table in the middle of the living room, complete with crimson red table cloth and fold-out chairs on either side, with pillows and sheets placed over them to pass them off as something of a higher quality. On the opposite side of the table to you, the chair was slightly lumpy. The lumps were explained when Papyrus pulled one of the sheets from the chair like a magician to reveal Sans, in a suit, lazily doing jazz hands.

"Ta-da! Here's your blind date! It's Sans! And Sans, oh my! What a surprise! Look who it is!"

Sans sat before you, smirking, obviously stifling laughter. You rolled your eyes exaggeratedly, giggling a little to yourself.

"Why are you laughing? What's so funny? This isn't meant to be funny!"

You managed to calm yourself down and take your seat at the table. "Sorry, Paps. I'll try and be serious. Starting now."

"Hm. Good. I'm going to go finish the spaghetti now. I will return shortly!" At that, Papyrus disappeared from the room, leaving you alone with Sans.

"Emphasis on try." you added.

Sans was unable to hold his laughter any longer. "Oh my god, what the fuck even is this."

"I know, right? Hey, nice reveal, by the way. Did Papyrus plan that?"

"Threw the thing over me without a word of warning. Was the surprise worth me sitting like that for like... 20 minutes?"

"Absolutely. The jazz hands was a nice touch, too."

"Could you guess that was my creative input?"

"Of course."

There was silence for a moment, before both of you howled with laughter.

"Holy shit." you wheezed, both of you catching your breath. "Also, you look pretty alright out of that hoodie of yours."

"Heh, yeah. Paps insisted I dress up tonight. Guess this really _suits_ me, huh?"

You made jokes with one another for the next few minutes before Papyrus arrived with two plates of spaghetti in his hands.

* * *

Dinner was nice, as was the obvious amount of effort Papyrus had put into the meal.

What wasn't so nice was him practically breathing down your necks while you ate, intending to keep the romance train from derailing. Unfortunately for him, it had the complete opposite effect, and wouldn't have worked anyway.

"Movie time!" Papyrus shouted, picking up the table with little to no effort and plopping it in the corner of the room. You and Sans were ushered from your chairs and on to the sofa, and the chairs were swiftly removed from your sight like the table before it.

The taller skeleton put on the surprise movie and left the room to "give you two some privacy".

A dying groan escaped you when you saw the first few seconds of Cars start playing on the brothers' TV. "Is he serious? Is he actually serious?"

"What, Lightning Mcqueen doesn't get you in the mood?" Sans replied.

"Are you saying he does for you?" you asked, jokingly raising an eyebrow.

"Man, don't kinkshame me."

Neither of you could even try and pay attention to the opening of the film while you were laughing. You were thankful for that.

* * *

The rest of the film was filled with more dumb jokes and endless discussion of the implications of Cars. "Since they're alive, do they have organs and stuff?" "Do they reproduce?" "How do they reproduce?" "Are humans a thing in this world?" "Where did they go?"

"God, what a fucked up movie." concluded Sans as the credits began to roll.

"Yeah. Can't wait for Pap to suggest we watch the sequel." you chuckled.

"Oh man, we've gotta see that together sometime."

"Absolutely."

A calm silence filled the room for a few moments. It was Papyrus, bursting in sporting a joyous grin, who broke it.

"So, have you changed your minds?"

You and Sans looked at eachother for a second, then shook your heads. With a defeated sigh that lead into a frustrated groan, Papyrus left the room.

"Well, this was fun, anyway. Even if Paps' intentions were for, uh, us to do more than just hang out like we usually do." you said, standing and stretching after being sat down for so long.

"Yeah. Hey, maybe he'll give up after this. Finally get that we're not into eachother."

"Hopefully, yeah."

* * *

It wasn't long before you were wishing the skeletons goodbye and heading home, filled with content.

When you did get home, you decided to end the evening with some video games and a slice of the pie Toriel had given you a few days ago.

Halfway through a level, you got a text. From Sans' number.

{Hello! It's me, Sans! I was wondering, would you please come to my house and ask me to be your boyfriend, and start a relationship that would be mutually beneficial? Also, I obviously have a bad memory, which is why I fail to remember to do simple tasks on a daily basis, and is also why I will most likely deny having sent this text! Please be adamant in telling me that I did indeed send this message! See you soon! -Sans}

You couldn't help but roll your eyes at the clearly fake text.

[Pap I know this is you dude]

[give Sans his phone]

{Hello again! I don't understand what you are saying. Surely you are joking in calling me "Pap". This is me, Sans, requesting that you please not let the work that my brother, The Great Papyrus, did go to waste, and date me! Thankyou! -Sans}

[Papyrus you've texted me before & I know how you text]

[and I know how Sans texts too]

[& you literally couldn't be more different in your texting styles]

[I'm not falling for it]

[give your brother his phone back]

{Hello! I don't knoqoif}

{dsfk}

[Pap??]

{kjdjjjjj}

[?????]

{hey}

[yo what happened?? this you Sans?]

{yeah}

{wrestled my phone back from paps}

[haha should've guessed from the keysmashing]

[have you read back through Paps' texts? like omg]

{lmao yeah}

{nice try bro}

[I'm gonna get back to what I was doing now]

{and that would be}

[video games :D]

{nice}

{later}

[ttyl - got things to do, monsters to kill]

[wAIT FUKC NO]

[SHIT NO I'M SO SORRY]

{its all good dude}

[I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT I MEAN FICTIONAL ONES]

[AND NOT LIKE YOUR SPECIES OR ANYTHING OH GOD]

{chill man its fine}

[omg I'm gonna scream I'm so sorry]

{its ok}

[I'm gonna be apologising all week now]

{get back to the game and chill dude}

{then get some sleep}

[ok ok ok]

[still sorry tho]

{it}

{is}

{fine}

{chill please god}

[aaaaa ok ok]

{later man}

[ttyl dude]

The embarrassment still fresh in your mind, you put your phone down and picked the controller back up. After around 5 minutes of play, your phone's text tone went off again.

{hey}

{before i leave you to your game}

{ive got a plan to try and get pap off our backs}

[...I'm listening]

{no youre not}

[what?]

{well}

{youre not listening are you}

{youre reading}

[omg]

[I don't believe this]

[whatever dude just tell me this plan of yours]

{okay so basically heres the idea}

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is just 100 words longer than the piece I took MONTHS writing for my drama GCSE and I did it in what?? 2 days?? B) nailing it


	4. A False Fight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans' plan is put into action.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my least favourite chapter to write so far lmao  
> I barely made the 1500 word minimum that I've been forcing on myself  
> like this whole thing is so dumb and I'm so glad I can move on to (what currently look like) better plot points  
> (but really I've been struggling with this one all day and cramps and the looming threat of school and the summer homework I didn't do CERTAINLY DIDN'T HELP)  
> (also ayyy keepin up the consistency in uploadin chapters well done Lols u did it)

"So, you wanna go over the plan one more time?"

You looked up from the game on your phone, giving Sans a questioning look.

"Sans, I don't quite think that this thing is complicated enough to warrant us 'going over' it. Paps gets back, we pretend to have a big fight, and he gets put off the idea of getting us together. Simple."

"You just went over it." Sans retorted with a smug smile.

"You little shit."

At that moment, you heard the sound of Papyrus' car pulling into the driveway.

"Oh man, here he comes. Get ready, dude." said Sans, jumping up off the couch. You followed suit, clearing your throat in preparation.

Just as you heard the sound of the front door opening, Sans immediately took an angered, defensive stance, clenching his fists, pointing his now fiery gaze in your direction.

"Are you kidding me?!" he roared. "No, no, no, you know what? Screw this! Screw you!"

You were taken aback at Sans' sudden intensity, but stood your ground and came up with something equally vague to throw back at him in your poorly planned argument.

"Oh, bite me, bonehead! God, I don't know how I manage to put up with you!"

"Um..." mumbled a confused Papyrus, who you saw out of the corner of your eye, standing frozen in front of the front door. "...a-are you two quite alrigh-"

"Putting up with me?! I can barely look at you now that I know that you..." He paused dramatically, pointing at you, his acting skills proving to be unexpectedly impressive. "...think that Sonic could beat Mario in a fight!"

You had to stop yourself from bursting out laughing at that moment, and you struggled to not break character.

"His feet are so fast! He could kick Mario a hundred times before his pudgy fists could throw a single punch! It's mind-boggling how you can't see the obvious winner would be Sonic!"

Papyrus was growing more visibly distressed as the argument increased in volume. "...Sans? Human? What is-"

"You're insane! Give the dude a fire flower, that hedgehog of yours is toast."

The silliness of the current conversation was making it incredibly difficult to keep acting mad, but any cracks in the facade went completely over Papyrus' head. Things were going well so far.

"Well, Sir Douchenozzle, if we're adding powerups into the equation, I've got two words for you. SUPER. SONIC."

At those words, the argument became unintelligible shouting, all mixed up false roars of rage over a hypothetical battle between Mario and Sonic. Meanwhile, Papyrus stood by, trying his hardest to pipe up and fix the situation, but failing immensely. Even his proud, often booming voice wasn't enough to break through the fight.

"Ugh, whatever! Fuck this! I'm out!" you finally bellowed, stomping your way towards the front door, and slamming it shut on your way out.

Finally out of sight and earshot of Papyrus, you let out enough giggles to calm yourself down. When you were done, you listened closely to the skeletons' voices through the door.

"Sans, what was that?"

"Doesn't matter. I'm going to bed."

"It's two in the afternoon! And you didn't even answer my question! What... why were you fighting just now? I thought you were very good friends!" The concern was audible in Papyrus' voice.

"Can't fucking believe...Sonic...what a joke..." you heard Sans mutter, along with the telltale sound of him treading up the stairs.

"Sans, I..." Paps' voice trailed off, and there was silence for a few moments before he could be heard walking to the front door.

You panicked, dropping to the floor and sitting just below the sight of the living room window, head in your hands, getting back into the angry role, and then Papyrus was outside. He looked around for a moment before spotting you, and approaching cautiously.

"Human? What happened there?" he eventually asked.

"Sans and I got in a fight."

"But why?"

"I don't know, dude. It just... happened." You sighed. "Look, I'd rather not think about Sans for a while. I'm going home." you added, standing again.

"O-okay." He paused. "Would you like me to drive you home?"

You breathed, pretending to calm yourself down from your previous fit of anger. "Yeah, that'd be nice. Thanks, Papyrus."

You made sure it was a silent drive back to your place. The less questions asked, the better. It would help with the plan. Then after a few days, maybe a week, of 'being in a fight' -  however long until Pap forgot about his plans for you and Sans - you would 'make up' and get everything back to normal.

As soon as Papyrus began driving off, you pulled out your phone and rang Sans' number. After a few seconds, he picked up.

"Holy fuck." followed by Sans' laughter was the first thing you heard.

You couldn't help but laugh along with him. "Oh my god! What was that?"

"Only the most convincing-looking argument ever."

"Yeah, well, to Paps at least." You both calmed yourselves down before continuing the conversation. "So, 'Operation: Paps Gets Bored' is underway."

"Let's do this."

* * *

A few hours later, you were engrossed in a game of Tetris when you received a text from Papyrus.

{Hello, Human! Have you been alright since I left you at your house? Also, I hope very much that things will get better between you and my brother! I've been quite worried about the both of you! I hope to see you soon! -Papyrus}

You felt kind of bad, thinking about how genuinely concerned he was. But, at least for now, he'd forgotten about trying to get you and Sans to date! That was something.

[yeah, I'm fine, Pap - sorry to make you worry.]

[probably won't be round your place for a while though]

{Hello! I am glad that you are feeling okay. I haven't been sure if I should ask about what happened, but I will not pry if you do not want me to. I must ask, though, do you think you will make up with Sans soon? -Papyrus}

[why do you ask?]

[also, I don't know.]

{Hi! I only ask because this whole argument situation has thrown a wrench into the machinations of your blooming relationship that I have assisted in building! I do hope you are friends again (and more) presently! -Papyrus}

...He wasn't saying what you thought he was saying, was he?

Well, it was ok. Today was just the beginning. After a few days, he'd surely be uncomfortable with keeping on trying to make you and Sans an item.

* * *

It had been a week, and The Plan had done nothing.

Both you and Sans had decided you couldn't keep this facade of having fallen out up any longer. If Pap hadn't been turned away from his goals by now, it was never going to work. It was time to give up.

You didn't make a huge deal of 'making up' - you just started hanging out again as usual, to the confusion of many, who all refrained from actually questioning either of you about it.

"Wow, what a failure that was. Congrats Sans." he berated himself, slouching next to you on the skelebros' sofa. "Man, I was so sure it was gonna work."

"You and me both." you sighed. "Well, it was worth a shot anyway."

"But he's still just as set on making us smooch as before! It was a disaster and a stupid idea and I'm an idiot." he continued.

"Dude." You patted him on the shoulder. "You're not an idiot. Don't put yourself down like that. At least you had an idea. Meanwhile, I sat here and decided to put up with Paps'... well, it's kind of, uh, intense shipping, isn't it?"

You chuckled, with Sans following a second after.

"Heh, yeah, I guess it is." There was a moment of dead silence throughout the house before he spoke up again.

"Thanks for saying I'm not an idiot, by the way. Means a lot to me."

You smirked. "'Means a lot' as in the emotions that you hide the moment they become anything deeper than a puddle, or 'means a lot' as in that time I gave you a piece of gum?"

"Yeah." was Sans' only response.

"Cool." you replied, smiling, glad to be able to talk face to face with your friend again. You'd missed this, even if it was only a week you'd gone without the playful conversing.

* * *

Sans eventually confessed to Papyrus that the whole fight was fake, so as to quell his anxiety of talking about Mario and/or Sonic in front of either of you. He was upset and a little disappointed, but at the same time, ten times as happy and relieved. It was nice to see him so content again. To see him so... for lack of a better word, so Papyrus again!

It was less nice when he went back to his plotting and scheming to make you and Sans a thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to sleep  
> praise Rebecca Sugar and Here Comes A Thought for bringing out my writing mojo all day somehow


	5. Sans, Who Is Absolutely (Not) Your Boyfriend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This time, it's your plan that's put into action. And that plan is fake dating.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> STILL KINDA KEEPING UP THE CONSISTENCY OF UPDATES EVEN IF THIS ONE TOOK A BIT LONGER  
> WOOOOOO  
> BUT THE LONGER WAIT DIDN'T EVEN MEAN A LONGER CHAPTER IT'S STILL AS LONG AS USUALWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

It was at your house, while you were playing video games with Sans, when an idea suddenly came to you.

"What if we, like, gave Papyrus what he wants?" you blurted out, seemingly out of nowhere to Sans. 

He choked on the ketchup he was drinking almost cartoonishly.

"I... you... what?" he responded after having coughed up the ketchup in his... throat?

"Well, no, not like that, it's just... what if we pretended to date? I mean, we're close enough friends that not a lot would have to change between us. All we have to do is just say we're going out, and Paps would be none the wiser!"

You watched Sans visibly contemplate your words, trying to gauge what he thought. Of course, with Sans, that was always a bit of a troublesome task.

"Yeah... yeah, that could work..." he muttered at last. "Yeah. Okay. Let's give it a shot."

"Yeah? You think it's a good idea?"

"Please, dude. I'm the one who comes up with plans that fail."

"Man, don't keep beating yourself up about that."

"Heh, I'll try not to. But, uh, back to the matter at hand."

"Okay. So, you like the idea?

"Hell yeah. But how are we gonna go about it, precisely?"

* * *

 

"You... w-what?" Papyrus was almost speechless when you told him the 'news' round at their house.

"We've seen the light! You got your wish! We're dating, Pap!" you cheered.

The squeal of delight that came from Papyrus when your words finally hit him and the twinkle in his eye sockets was adorable.

"Really?! My reasoning finally got through to you?!"

Both you and Sans, holding hands, nodded, and without a second for you to respond, Papyrus had scooped up the both of you effortlessly, squeezing you in a tight hug.

"I'm so glad! Oh, goodness, these past few weeks of tireless work have finally paid off!" He dropped you both without warning, causing the two of you to stumble for a second when your feet hit the floor. "Oh, oh! I have to go tell Alphys! She'll be so excited!"

Sheer excitement radiating off of him, he bounded up the stairs to his room, from which the sound of intense typing could be heard a few seconds afterwards.

Gleeful giggling from upstairs was all that kept the house from being silent for the next few moments, before you spoke up.

"Have we made a horrible mistake? I think we maybe messed up. Bad."

"I guess only time will tell." responded Sans, falling back onto the sofa behind him.

"I suppose so." you sighed, before joining him in sitting down.

Your mind wandered for a minute after that, and you further pondered whether you should've suggested your idea in the first place. Maybe not. God knows what Papyrus would do next. You expected him to be sated and content with finally seeing his plans come to fruition, but instead, he had gotten more worked up than he was during any other attempt to get you and Sans together. Things were already going worse than you'd hoped.

You stared off into space, failing to pay attention to anything around you, too consumed by the thoughts of your potentially terrible decision.  _How long are we going to need to keep this up? God, fuck, why didn't I consider Paps' enthusiasm beforehand? Damnit._

But... maybe this won't be so bad. Maybe Pap would understand that being datemates doesn't have to mean doing romantic stuff every second of every day. Maybe he'll get over the initial excitement of having gotten what he wanted and stop caring about your relationship with Sans. And then you could quietly 'break up'. Yeah. This would be alright.

When you came back to reality, you didn't expect to find Sans' arm around you, his face exceedingly close to your own.

"So, babe, how's it going?" he asked, wiggling his skeletal equivalent of eyebrows at you jocularly.

You only responded with laughter when you were over the abruptness of his actions, at which point he involuntarily ended up doing the same.

"Aw, come on, you lost all interest in me or something? I'm hurt." he managed to say through his own laughter.

"Oh, no, Sansy," you chuckled sarcastically, leaning into him. "I would never! I am so, so, so very sorry, my dear, sweet boyfriend!"

"Well then," he said, in a similar playful tone to the one you had taken on. "You're forgiven. And it's all okay, as long as we both love eachother and whatever."

"But of course, Sans, my dearest!" You punctuated your 'love-filled' words with a blown kiss aimed at Sans' face.

The two of you broke down into sheer stupid guffawing, so much so that your face hurt from smiling and you both struggled to catch your breath.

"Oh, I'm just so happy for you two!"

Papyrus was back in the room. You hadn't noticed while caught up in your antics. His smile was full of glee, and his hands were clasped together in excitement after seeing your apparent affection towards one another.

"Alphys seemed quite glad to hear the news as well! She mentioned something about boats and cannons, which was confusing, but she said she'd explain what she was talking about later on... Oh, just look at you! And what did I say, hmm?" His smile became a slightly smug one. "You are literally perfect for each other! Was I right, or was I right?"

"You sure were right, Paps." said Sans, winking at you.

"I knew it!" exclaimed Papyrus, getting excited all over again after hearing his brother's affirmation of his matchmaking skills. All of a sudden, his face lit up. You could practically see the cartoon lightbulb above his head, indicating an idea.

He jumped and clapped his hands in delight. "Ooh, ooh! I have to go and make plans! I'm helping you kick off this relationship with a bang!" he said, immediately rushing to the front door. "I'll see you two later!"

And with that, he was out the door and gone, leaving you and Sans alone in the suddenly silent house.

"So," Sans eventually piped up. "This is happening."

"Yep. Sure is."

"...Man, I hope the 'bang' he's thinking of isn't the one I'm thinking of."

Laughter rang through the room once more, and for a little while, you forgot about wondering what Papyrus had in store for you and Sans.

* * *

 

That evening, you were lying on your sofa, watching some TV - some game show, which you would've totally won, considering the amount of times you shouted something along the lines of "No, it's THAT answer, dipstick!" at the contestants that you knew couldn't even hear you.

Your phone buzzed during the final round, and you looked over at it to find a text from Undyne.

{hey hi!}

[hey Undyne]

{ok SO.}

{I've been out all day for reasons and I just got back and Alphys is SUPER HYPED over a thing and she's got this sparkle in her eyes and it's SUPER CUTE!!!}

{BUT.}

{that's not what I wanted to talk about.}

{what I did want to talk about is THE THING SHE'S HYPED ABOUT.}

{she says Pap told her you and Sans are dating???}

[omg she's not really _that_ hyped about this is she?]

{yeah she is!!!}

{ALSO IS THAT A CONFIRMATION?}

[um]

[ok you can't tell Paps what I'm about to say alright?]

{I won't. you have my word. Royal Guard's honour AND I KNOW THERE TECHNICALLY ISN'T A ROYAL GUARD ANYMORE BUT IN MY HEART AND MY SOUL I AM STILL THE CAPTAIN AND I WILL EMBODY THE SPIRIT OF THE ROYAL GUARD!!}

{so let's hear it!!}

[so]

[we're not actually dating]

[we just want Papyrus to get off our backs and stop telling us that we should get together]

[we're gonna "break up" in like a week or 2 maybe?]

[so like we can say we tried it out and it didn't work or whatever]

[and then Pap will give up with his endless efforts to get us to smooch]

{oh.}

{ok then.}

{should I tell Alphys?}

[nah, you can keep her oblivious]

[besides, you said she looked super cute, right?]

{hELL YEAH SHE DOES!!!!!!!!!!!}

[so yeah, you can have that, and she can have her]

[uh]

[shipping]

{shipping? what's that?}

[go ask Alphys dude]

[I'm kinda surprised that you don't know what shipping is after living with her for so long lmao]

{alright!! I'll go do it now!}

{seeya later!}

[ttyl]

The conversation having finished, you turned your attention back to the TV again, where the show had come to an end. Of course the guy you were rooting for had lost.

You wondered if Alphys had explained to Papyrus what shipping was yet. God, the chaos that's gonna bring when she gets round to it.

 

Tomorrow would be better, you decided. Tomorrow, Papyrus would surely have calmed down about the whole thing, and you'd be able to end this thing sooner rather than later. No point in 'breaking up' with Sans while emotions are still running high with Pap, or he'll just be worked up and tell you that you barely even tried it, and go straight back to his extreme dedication to yours and Sans' relationship.

 

Tomorrow, you'd be another step closer to this whole thing being over.

* * *

 

That night, you dreamt something you only vaguely remembered in the morning.

 

Sans was there. You were lying across his lap, on your back. He was gently running his fingers through your hair. He said something that you didn't hear. But you know he said something - you saw his mouth move.

 

Everything after that was a blur, so much so that it faded into nothingness a mere handful of minutes after waking up. In fact, the blur infected the part of the dream that you could remember, having you forget it as soon as you started focusing on your morning routine.

 

Today was going to be alright - you were sure of that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so I found out that if I open up another tab while I write and put on Cr1tikal videos at 0.5x speed as noise in the background, I'm like 100 times more productive with my writing  
> so I'm gonna be doing that from now on and it might just help me do the second half of this fic  
> anyway this goes out to Charlie  
> god bless u dude


	6. Again, Papyrus? Really?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Papyrus sets up another date for you and Sans. It goes really well. Super well. Honestly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this one took WAY longer than the other chapters. School started again and wowie wow I'm already not enjoying 6th form. already thinking I should drop a course. anyway here it is hope u enjoy

"Plans".

You'd wondered what kind of plans Papyrus had envisioned when he said that.

In retrospect, it shouldn't have been such a surprise to find that he'd organised yet another date for you and Sans. At their house again, of course. You couldn't even say no to his 'invitation' - if you did, he'd inevitably make a fuss, and you just didn't want to deal with that.

It was like deja vu, walking up to the front door again, noticing the lack of light in the living room through the curtains. Only this time, you'd dressed for the occasion. Papyrus made sure of that, with multiple video calls from him to ensure you wouldn't be arriving in jeans and a t-shirt again. 

"Not that it matters in the same way as it did last time, since you're together now, and you won't be needing to charm my brother," he'd said, "but it does still matter! After all, part of the reason I hoped you would accept my proposal was to get him to be less lazy! We can't have you setting a bad example! You've got to put some effort into your appearance!"

So you'd dug out one of the nicer outfits in your wardrobe. The times you wore it were few and far between, but you had to admit, you looked pretty good during those times.

You hesitated just before going to knock, suddenly noticing the faint sound of Careless Whisper playing inside the house. You didn't even have to knock; in your moment of hesitation, Papyrus - ever vigilant and ready for your arrival - had rushed to the door and greeted you with his trademark enthusiasm.

"You're here! Brilliant!"

He led you through to the living room, covered once more in the romantic decor from last time. Had the sheet over Sans been there again, you would've sworn you were just living through this moment all over again. But it was gone this time, as this was an "actual" date instead of a blind one. He sat at the table, placed in the living room once more, engrossed in a game on his phone.

"Hey there, hot stuff." he said, not looking up from the screen in his hand, his face resting in his other hand.

"Sans!" Papyrus scolded. "Honestly, your datemate is here, we've put a lot of effort into this evening, I even got you into that suit again, and you can't even pay attention? Gah, why did I expect anything more?"

"Just gimme a sec, Paps, I'm on a roll here." Sans responded, still tapping away at the game.

He sighed. "I'm going to go make dinner. I hope you've put that phone away when I get back." He stomped out of the room, into the kitchen, leaving you with the seemingly disinterested Sans.

You took your seat opposite Sans, piping up with a "So, uh, yeah, hey man."

"What's up, du-ah, shit." he responded, dropping the phone to the table with a thud.

He chuckled before looking up at last, looking slightly taken aback when his eyes reached you.

"Oh. Uh. Hey, amigo." He silently looked you up and down for a moment. "Man, you clean up pretty good."

"Thanks." you responded, blushing ever so slightly.

"Y'know, it's, uh, a little weird to see you out of, like, t-shirts and stuff."

"It's weird to be out of them."

"Heh, yeah, I know how you feel."

"You still look just as _Sans-some_ in that suit as last time, though." you chuckled, with Sans following promptly afterwards.

"Yeah, guess it really _suits_ me, huh?"

"You used that one on our last Papyrus-induced date!"

"That was then, babe. This is now."

You both ended up laughing, any beginnings of any weird tension having dissipated entirely.

* * *

After a little while filled with conversation about the dog squad's recent escapades, Papyrus finally returned, carrying a plate of spaghetti. Just one.

"Dinner is served!" he exclaimed, as proud of himself as ever, placing the plate in the middle of the table.

"Uh, Paps?" Sans began, skeptical. "You know there's two of us here, right?"

"Of course!" said Papyrus, beaming. "During my preparation for this evening, I realised the fatal flaw in my previous plan! You remember how I watched that informative movie about the talking dogs? And how I learned about the romantic properties of spaghetti? Well, having analysed both the film and your blind date, it came to my attention that the reason your evening did not reach exceptional dating levels is because I served two plates of spaghetti, instead of just one!"

He calmed down slightly before continuing. "I considered getting dog costumes for the both of you, but I figured that wouldn't add anything to it. And they were slightly out of my price range, to say the very least." He ended his spiel by clearing his throat (you still didn't question that), and saying "I know it's not quite necessary, since you two are dating already, but, oh, I just had to help you two reach maximum dating capacity! Well, I'll leave you to it!" He finally finished and left, practically skipping up the stairs to his bedroom.

A silence swept over the room with Papyrus suddenly gone.

"Well, alright then." you finally spoke.

"He really wants us to Lady and the Tramp this thing." said Sans.

Another moment of silence.

"Do you want the spaghetti? I mean, as, y'know, a skeleton made of magic, I kind of don't really need to eat, so, uh... yeah, you can just go ahead if you want. You're probably hungry."

"Uh... sure. Thanks, dude."

It seemed neither of you were quite interested in re-enacting Papyrus' new favourite movie scene.

It was an awkward few minutes of you eating the spaghetti, and Sans sitting by, just kind of watching. When it eventually got too painful, you broke the silence again.

"So, wait, did Paps say he was thinking of getting us fursuits?"

Sans thought for a moment, eyes widening.

"Oh, holy shit, he did."

Laughter replaced the silence once more, and the rest of the evening ended up being significantly less uncomfortable for the both of you.

* * *

 

That was, until Papyrus returned after that night's movie.

The choice of film was left to you and Sans this time, thankfully, so of course, you ended up watching the cinematic masterpiece, Birdemic: Shock and Terror.

When the credits had finished rolling, and you were finished guffawing at the special effects and the coat hangers, Papyrus made his way into the room tentatively, a bright smile across his face.

"I assume you two had quite a good time?"

"We sure did, Paps." you responded.

"Oh, good! I'm glad you two had fun!"

"Heh, yeah. This was nice." Sans turned to you. "So, uh, I guess you'll be heading home now, right? Since it's kinda late and all."

"Yeah, I suppose I should get going." You yawned. "Man, bad movies sure take a lot out of me. I'm gonna be completely beat tomorrow morning." You started getting up to leave, but were interrupted by Papyrus.

"Wait!"

You stopped in your tracks. "What is it, Pap?"

"Well, from the sounds of it, you're very tired. Very very tired. And the trip home will only keep you awake longer! That is why I advise, nay, insist, that you spend the night here, so as to ensure you get the minimum amount of sleep that humans require!"

He did make a convincing argument. You were pretty tired.

"Yeah, alright then. I have to admit, I can't really be bothered with going home."

"Brilliant! I'll go find a spare set of pyjamas for you!" he said, and then he skipped away again.

"So I'm guessing I'll be on the couch, right?"

"What?" said Papyrus, peeking back in through the door. "I thought you and Sans were dating."

"Uh... yeah..." Sans answered. "...but what does that have to do with anything, bro?"

"Well, don't couples usually sleep in the same bed together?"

And with just a few words, you knew the evening would be troublesome.

"Well, sure, yeah, Paps, but I'm not sure we're quite at that level yet, y'know?" Sans scratched the back of his skull nervously.

"Nonsense! You two obviously care about each other very much! Why should these sleeping arrangements be out of the question?"

"Uh, w-well, you see, bro-"

"It's ideal! And it would even mean that I won't have to search the entire house trying to scavenge for blankets! You remember the incident from last time we had a guest, don't you?"

Sans sighed a resigned sigh. "Yeah, I remember."

"They're still in therapy."

"They sure are."

"So, you'll be sleeping with each other tonight?"

"God, please don't say it like that, Papyrus."

* * *

 

For every one of his reasons you should sleep in Sans' bed with him, you had a counter-argument. But for every one of those, Papyrus had a counter-counter-argument. There seemed to be no avoiding it. You couldn't even tell him that you'd make your way home and sleep in a little later to make up for what sleep you'd lose, because the weather decided a thunderstorm should ruin that possibility.

Papyrus bid the two of you goodnight after you'd all finished your night time routines, and you were left alone with Sans in his room. It felt like an entirely different room from the one you'd hung out in with Sans in the past.

"I can probably try and sneak downstairs to go sleep on the couch." you said, still standing awkwardly in the middle of the room. "Paps'll probably be asleep already, so it should be alright."

"No, man, I can't let you do that. You'll get cold without any blankets." Sans responded. "If anything, I should sleep on the couch. I mean, I literally lived in a town called Snowdin."

"Dude, no, no, this is your bed we're talking about. You take it. I'm sure I won't be that cold."

"Come on, just take the bed, man."

"No, you take the bed."

After another minute or two of bickering, you both came to a realisation. You were the one to vocalise it.

"Paps is gonna think something's up if he sees one of us on the couch." 

"Shit, you're right. Ugh, if I knew what time he wakes up we could wake up early enough to avoid that, but I'm always asleep too long."

"...We kind of... don't have a choice, then, do we?"

"I guess not."

Silence hung over the room for a few moments before Sans finally broke it.

"Y'know what? Fuck it. Why are we making this so awkward? There's nothing weird about this unless we try and make it weird. We both agree that this is purely platonic, right?"

"Right." you responded.

"Right. So this shouldn't be a big deal. We're just friends, just happening to sleep in the same bed. There shouldn't be anything wrong with that."

"No... no, you're right, there shouldn't be. There isn't!"

"Yeah!"

"Yeah!"

After another minute like that of hyping each other up and convincing the worst parts of your own minds that this was strictly platonic, you found yourselves in the bed, spacing yourselves away from each other as best you could.

"Well, goodnight, I guess."

"Yeah, uh, night, dude."

And in time, you both drifted off to sleep.

* * *

 

You awoke in the middle of the night, finding Sans' bony arms wrapped around you. After having gotten over your initial surprise and blushing, you realised his skeletal form was trembling, and he was sweating like hell.

"Sans?" you whispered. There was no response. "Sans? You awake, dude?" you whispered again, slightly louder.

Apparently not.

You tried to remove his arms from your body, but his grip was tighter than you expected. It took some effort to finally pry his hands away from you, and when you did, he started shaking harder.

When he started screaming, you realised what was going on.

He was having one of those nightmares he'd mentioned to you in passing before.

"Oh, shit."

You hastily turned over to face him, his arms and legs beginning to thrash and fight against the restraints of his covers.

"Sans? Sans! Wake up, dude!" you began, shaking him gently all the while. "Sans!"

His eyes eventually shot open, his left lit up with a bright blue glow and the right a pitch black instead of his usual white pinpricks, light blue tears streaming out of his sockets. You stopped shaking him then.

He scrambled to sit up against the headboard of the bed, then threw his hands over his still screaming mouth. He stared straight ahead, fear in his wide open eyes, and you gently place your hand on his shoulder.

"Sans? Sans, are you alright? Sans!"

His gaze turned to meet you, his screams beginning to die down and the lights in his eyes returning to normal.

"Sans?"

He went silent, the only sound in the room becoming his hyperventilating and thick swallowing.

"Sans, it's ok, dude, it's ok. Focus on calming your breathing. Everything's ok."

Despite a thousand things running through his mind at once, he managed to slow down his breathing, just as you told him.

"You alright, Sans?"

"I... I-I had... f-fuck, I can't..." He shut his eyes, going silent again apart from his breathing.

"It's okay, dude, take your time."

He moved a hand onto the one of yours on his shoulder, gripping it tightly, and placed the other on your own shoulder for support.

You waited for his breathing to get mostly back to normal and his grip on you to loosen before speaking.

"Hey, are you alright?" you questioned at last.

"I... I think..." he responded, looking up at you again.

"Did you just have a nightmare?"

"Y-yeah..."

"Wanna talk about it?"

"No... no, I'd rather not..."

"Do you need anything? Like, a glass of water or something?"

"Yeah, water... water sounds good, thanks..."

"Alright. Be back in a sec."

You rushed to get the water and get back to Sans, spilling some on your way back up the stairs.

His hands shook when he took the glass from you, and he ended up spilling a good portion of it too when he went to drink it.

"You feeling any better?"

"Y-yeah, yeah... I'm ok, I just... fuck, I cant..." He paused. "Papyrus is ok, right?"

"Mhm. Paps is fine. Everything's fine. It's all ok. Don't worry. You want me to check on him?"

"Please. I... shit, I hope I didn't wake him."

"I'm sure you didn't. I'll just be a second."

You made your way to Papyrus' room, creaking open the door slowly to find him sound asleep in his race car bed, then made your way back.

"Yep, just like I thought." you said, closing Sans' door behind you. "He's fine. Nothing to worry about."

"Ok... ok, yeah... alright... Thankyou."

"You sure you don't want to talk about that nightmare? It might help you feel better."

"N-no... not now, at least. I don't wanna think about it."

"Alright. I won't bug you about it."

The room was quiet after that, apart from the sound of Sans intently gulping down his water. You wanted to let him calm down completely before making him talk again.

All of a sudden, his trembling hands dropped his glass, and it clattered to the floor, spilling what water was left onto the carpet.

Something inside him snapped at that point, and the translucent blue tears began flowing down his face again. Then he hugged you, practically throwing himself at you in the process.

"I'm sorry, I'm really fucking sorry, I just... god, I can't..." he sobbed.

You wrapped your own arms around him. "Hey, hey, hey, it's ok, dude. It's all good. I'm here for you."

"...I just..." He paused for a while, trying to calm himself all over again.

"...You're the first person to know about these nightmares I have. I haven't told anyone, not even Paps. It's not like anyone would understand. And, well... I just... having someone here is so much better than just waking up from this shit and sitting awake for the rest of the night. Thanks for being so cool about this."

"Hey, it's no problem, man. What kind of friend would I be if I didn't help you through this?"

"Heh, I guess you're right about that." Sans seemed to have cheered up, even if slightly. "Man, it looks like you staying in bed with me was the best way things could've gone tonight."

"Sure does."

"Uh, you mind not mentioning the whole nightmare thing to Paps, or anyone else, for that matter? Just to, uh, make some stuff easier for me."

"Of course. Hey, if you ever need to talk to someone about all this, I'm here for you, dude."

"Thanks. Maybe I'll take you up on that offer at some point or another."

You both enjoyed each other's hug filled company for the next few minutes - Sans, relishing in the first form of comfort he'd ever received for his problems, and you, glad you could help your friend.

Within a short while, you'd both fallen asleep, still clinging to each other.

Platonically, of course.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's late I have school 2morrow I'm going to bed  
> again sorry it took so long and hope u enjoyed <3


	7. This Is Something.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You wake up and Sans is there. Also other things?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> frick I'm sorry this took so long and it's short and b a d I've been writing other things and been busy with school and existential crises and by writing other things I mean trying to write any one of these fics I've got in the works and playing like. tetris or something instead. the other two things are correct though  
> anyway yes this fic lives hope u enjoy

Waking up in Sans' bed with him clinging to you like a koala was confusing. Then you recalled the previous night.

Well, you didn't have anything in particular that you had to do today, but it was rolling around to 10 o'clock, according to your phone, and brunch sounded good.

 

You tried to disentangle yourself from his arms, but his tight hold on you only increased. You had no choice. You had to wake him up.

"Hey. Hey Sans." you said quietly, shaking him. "Sans, get up."

He shifted in his sleep, but still wasn't letting go.

"Sans. Wake up. I want to go do stuff."

"Dude, do you even know how comfy you are?" he muttered, apparently awake. "Just a couple more minutes."

"Come on, Sans. I'm hungry. Get off me."

He seemed to contemplate your words for a moment before actually letting go. "Alright, alright. What's the time?"

"10-ish."

"Wow. Not bad."

He finally let go and stretched, then disappeared and reappeared again by the door.

"I'll let you get dressed. Then we could head to Grillby's for some breakfast, if you want."

"Brunch." you corrected.

"Well, yeah, I guess, but this is me you're talking to."

"I guess you have a point there. It's still brunch though."

"Anyway, Grillby's sound good?"

"Sure."

"Cool." And then he was gone.

...And then he was back in the next instant, holding a handful of your clothes.

"I grabbed these from your place for you. Since, y'know, what you've got there is, uh, a bit formal for Grilb's place."

* * *

When you were dressed and ready, you made your way downstairs, where Papyrus greeted you with his usual enthusiasm. You expected him to berate you for letting yourself and his brother sleep in as late as you did - instead, though, he addressed you with a cheerful smile.

"Good morning, friend! Did you sleep well? I assume so!"

"Morning, Paps. Yeah, yeah, I slept just fine."

Papyrus giggled gleefully. "Why, of course! I didn't even have to ask!"

You mulled over his words for a second before questioning him. "And why is that?"

"Oh, well, I mean... just look at you two!"

He grabbed his phone and showed you a photo.

From last night.

Of you and Sans cuddling.

"You... You're not going to do anything with that, are you?"

"No, no, of course not, I just thought it was very sweet! And I just had to immortalize the moment with a photo!"

"Well... ok..."

"Hey, you ready to go?" asked Sans, having teleported to you again, making you jump at the suddenness of his appearance.

"Uh, yeah. Yeah, let's go!" If you could avoid Papyrus getting too overexcited over your "relationship" with Sans, you were going to.

"Alright then. Well, see you later, Paps! We're heading off to Grillby's!"

"Oh! For brunch, I assume?" Papyrus asked.

"Ha!" You poked Sans' skull. "Brunch. What did I say?"

"Yep, right on the nail, Pap." he answered, ignoring your jab at him. "So, how's about we get going, _babe_?"

You chuckled, still unused to the joking nickname. "Absolutely."

* * *

You were sitting in a booth at Grillby's, digging into a plate of the pub's delicious, greasy, all-day breakfasts, before you knew it. Sans sat opposite you, sipping at a bottle of ketchup. Your happy munching at your food was interrupted by Sans speaking.

"I'm, uh... I'm sorry about last night. And this morning. Didn't know I was that much of a cuddler, heh." He was blushing slightly.

"Man, don't even worry about that." you said, finishing another bite of toast. "It was kind of nice. You're actually pretty warm and cuddly for a skeleton."

Unexpectedly, Sans kept the very personal topic of conversation going - quite unlike himself.

"But I mean, the whole Nightmare thing, too. As great as it was to not have to go through that alone for once, I wish you didn't have to deal with all that..."

"Hey, a problem shared is a problem halved, right? Chill."

"Yeah. Thanks." He smiled. "I... man, I just-"

"You don't want to keep talking about this, do you?"

"God, no." he sighed, relieved.

"Didn't think so." you chuckled.

The calm, welcome quiet between you two returned, yet the room was not silent thanks to the ambient chatter of the other customers around you.

"So... what was Paps showing you before I came in earlier?" Sans asked. "He seemed pretty excited."

"Oh, god," you groaned. "Have a guess."

Sans sat silently and thought for a moment, sipping absentmindedly at his ketchup. "Nope, haven't got a clue."

"Well-" you began, interrupted by your phone going off.

When you checked it, you found a text from Papyrus. With a picture. The picture of you and Sans sleepily cuddling.

{Hello! I thought you might want to keep this picture, so I am sending it to you! Is it not adorable? See you later! -Papyrus}

"Wow, Pap, that's some timing right there. Well, here it is." You turned you phone around to show Sans the picture, and his reaction was almost instantaneous, his eye sockets widening and his usual grin faltering.

"Oh my god. He didn't."

"He did."

Sans dropped his head to the table, groaning loudly.

"Yeah, I feel you there, dude." you said, taking a swig of your cola.

He sighed, lifting his head again to look at you. "What are we gonna do about my brother?"

"God knows." you responded. "But, hell, he's gotta run out of enthusiasm some time, righ-" You stopped yourself, thinking. "Okay, maybe not, since it's Papyrus and all, but still, he's gotta lose interest soon, yeah?"

"Well... I mean, it's possible. We've just gotta hope he gives up. Eventually."

"Yeah. Eventually."

* * *

Weeks passed, and it seemed like "eventually" would never come. Papyrus' eagerness to try and set you up on more dates - dates which you and Sans managed to take charge of and turned into the plain old friendly movie nights and hangouts you'd grown to know and love in the past - never decreased, as if time hadn't passed at all, as if every yesterday had been the day you'd told him about your "relationship".

It got tiring very, very quickly.

Especially when you were interrupted from an early-afternoon cartoon binge session by a phone call from the tall skeleton.

"Double date!" was the immediate, shrieking, overexcited sound from the phone as soon as you answered.

"W-what? Papyrus?"

"S-sorry." he said, having calmed himself slightly. "My friend! Are you free this evening?"

"Yeah, I guess, but... Papyrus, wh-what the fu-"

"Well then!" he interruped. "I'm sure you will be interested in coming on a double date tonight!"

"Wait, with who?"

"Why, with my brother, of course! He's your boyfriend!"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, I mean who's the other couple?"

"Oh, w-well..." he stuttered, giggles of glee slipping through in his excitement. "It'll be... Mettaton and I! Can you believe it?!"

"Woah, seriously? Wow. Never knew you liked him like that. I guess I should've known from that collection of action figures of yours. Heh, good on you, Paps!"

"Yes! Anyway, will you be accompanying us?"

"Well, I-"

"Sans has expressed interest in joining us, just so you know!"

That right there stopped you in your tracks. Sans was going along with the idea of the two of you being dragged into another date situation?

"Really?"

"Yes! He truly has! I know, it's surprising - you'd think he'd be trying to seemingly avoid it and just have another movie night with you, but no!"

"...Huh. Well then."

"So will you be coming along? Pleeease! It will be so fun! And, um... I would appreciate the comfort of my friends being there... o-on my first date with my new boyfriend... I'm a little nervous, to say the least."

Oh, lord. This skeleton was going to be the death of you.

You sighed, yet couldn't help but smile. "Sure, yeah, I guess. I'll come along." 

"Oh, wonderful! Well, I shall call you back in just a few minutes. Mettaton and I have to work out just a few more details, and then we will inform you of the plan! Goodbye!"

"Yeah, later, Paps."

* * *

Before you knew it, it was hours later, and you were sat on your couch, all dressed up and waiting to be picked up. You were apparently going to a fancy restautant - Mettaton's treat. You'd never met the guy... robot... superstar... you'd only seen a few minutes of one of his shows in passing over at the skelebros' house, but he was growing on you already.

The whole afternoon, you'd pondered Sans' apparent interest in this double date, the thought a little confusing to you, but you decided to roll with it.

You really shouldnt've been surprised when Sans so suddenly appeared in your living room, equally as dressed up as you, but you still jumped out of your skin when you looked around only to find him there.

"Sup."

"Christ, Sans, don't do that!"

"Man, I teleport to you all the time. What, you nervous?"

"No, it's not that. I mean, maybe. I'm actually kind of looking forward to this, in a weird way. I'm sure meeting the 'star of the underground' will be fun." I just..." You hesitated for a moment. "Papyrus said you were pretty into the idea of this double date thing. Is... is that true?"

"Oh, god," Sans began, rolling his eyes. "Look, I was tired as shit this morning. I was half awake, and I guess I didn't know what I was agreeing to."

He sighed and smiled.

"But really, who can say no to that face?" he chuckled.

"Yeah, I feel you there." you responded, with your own chuckle following shortly after.

Sans bounced on his heels for a moment. "So, are we gonna get going, or..."

"Sure." you answered. "May as well get this thing over and done with."

"Alrighty then."

He linked his arm with yours, leaving you confused for a moment before he explained himself. "Been having a funny five minutes with my shortcuts. Hold tight, heh."

Before you could hold tighter, though, everything went black, and a wave of dizziness rushed over you. Then, an instant later, you were both there, outside the restaurant. Right on time.

You headed inside, and before you could properly get your bearings once more, Papyrus' voice rang out from the other side of the room.

"Oh! Oh! Hello! Brother! Friend! Over here!"

He jumped up and waved frantically at you, and next to him sat Mettaton, looking up at the skeleton, smiling warmly.

"Over here! Our table's over here! Sans! Human!"

This was gonna be fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> again, sorry it took so long & is dumb 4give me pls  
> this fic is my firstborn baby and so I should be jailed for child neglect  
> things'll get better for this fic in the future, friends.  
> hmu at my tumblr to chastise me for my uselessness lmao - it's lollyholly99 <3


	8. Breakup: Let The Party Start!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The double date leads to ideas that you're all too happy to go along with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as much as I want to smooch BOTH the skellies BOY HOWDY DO I LIKE ME SOME PAPYTON. like they're both so in love with themselves AND NOW EACHOTHER. and you can't forget the part where the thought of Papy fanboying over the robot AND THEN SMOOCHING HIM AND/OR GETTING SMOOCHES FROM HIM is ADORABLE.  
> sorry I'll let you get to the fic now.

"So, darlings, how did you two get together?" Mettaton questioned in the middle of your meal, looking honestly intrigued.

Of all the things you and Sans had planned for, you couldn't believe you hadn't rehearsed an answer to this question. Welp.

"It was me!" Papyrus piped up, beaming, relieving you to no end. "I was the catalyst! I showed them how perfect they were for each other and they finally understood! Isn't it wonderful?"

"Oh, it certainly is, Papy, dear." said Mettaton, turning back to the two of you. "Best friends, and now lovers. How beautiful! Well, of course..." He paused, posing in his seat, lifting his leg into the air higher than you would've thought possible. "...Not as beautiful as me!" He then went back to sitting normally, as if nothing happened.

"Or you, for that matter, sweetie." He added, kissing Papyrus on his cheekbone.

Papyrus' reaction was instantaneous, the light orange glow of his face growing brighter until the majority of his face was enveloped in the ever-deepening hue.

"N-nyeh... heh heh... Yes... T-those are both quite true..." Papyrus stuttered, chuckling and wringing his hands nervously.

Mettaton giggled at Papyrus before turning to you and Sans once again. "Really, though, how adorable that is! Did you ever think you'd start dating one another?"

"Not in the slightest." you answered, not missing a beat.

Sans sipped at a specially requested bottle of ketchup, happy to sit back while you spoke with the humanoid robot.

"Well, you really should have considered it sooner, hmm? Papyrus is smarter than you might think, you know. He knows what he's doing."

"Uh... yeah, I suppose."

"Honestly, this is my first time seeing you two together, and I can already see the chemistry between you! I didn't star in all those romance movies to just not end up with an acute sense of what star-crossed lovers look like!"

"Uh... Uh-huh."

You took a sip of your drink, glancing at Sans and rolling your eyes. Mettaton didn't notice, as he began a spiel about his long history of acting achievements, listing off movies and shows to an equally invested Papyrus, who chimed in with an enthusiastic "Oh yes, that's one of my favourites!" or a "You were amazing in that one!" or "Oh, I still need to watch that!" every so often.

The majority of the rest of the date consisted of Papyrus' praise towards Mettaton, and the robot basking in said praise. Of course, Mettaton did manage to reciprocate most, if not all, of the love, overall probably giving the skeleton that "shower of kisses" that Sans had mentioned him dreaming of over the course of the evening.

Meanwhile, you and Sans sat by, in silence - apart from the instances when Papyrus would ask one of you for an opinion on a movie or episode of a show.

Well, the food was good, and watching Papyrus and Mettaton fawn over one another was pretty cute. It was a pretty decent evening - you didn't even have to keep up the schtick of you and Sans dating, since the other two were too preoccupied with each other!

Yeah. A good evening. A nice evening.

* * *

You awoke the next morning - afternoon, really, you slept in pretty late - to a text.

{hey}

Sans.

[heyo]

{so}

{i need to talk to you}

[about what?]

{nothing bad i swear}

[ok?]

[yeah alright]

[I'll be over in a bit]

{no need}

{you decent?}

You looked down at yourself, still lying in bed, in your pyjamas, still groggy from having just woken up, before responding to the text.

[yeah, why?]

{1 sec}

And one second you waited.

Then, when that second had passed, Sans was there, just in front of your bedroom door.

"Sup."

"Hey."

"Mind if I sit down?" Sans asked, gesturing to the empty space on your bed.

"Uh, sure, go ahead."

No sooner than the words left your mouth, he was sitting by your feet, covered by your duvet.

"So," he began. "Last night got me thinking."

"Uh-huh..."

"Like, really thinking."

"Yeah..."

"Mettaton and my bro seemed pretty interested in eachother, didn't they?"

"Uh, yeah?"

"Ok, so, you saw how they completely forgot we were even there at some point?"

"Yeah? Sans, where are you going with thi-"

"I realised something."

"And what would that be?"

Sans took a deep breath, and his smile widened.

"We can break up."

"I... What?"

"Dude!" he exclaimed, with the most enthusiasm you'd ever seen him display. Which still wasn't an incredible amount, but still, it was something. "They were so wrapped up in each other last night that they barely even noticed we were there!"

You thought for a second. "Oh shit, you're right!"

"Yeah! So, what I'm thinking is this. We 'break up'. Like, soon. We break this thing off while they're still all over each other, and Paps doesn't throw a fit over his... his OTP or whatever. We're free!"

"Oh my god!" was the only response you could conjure, practically beaming at the realisation.

"I know, right?"

"Man..." you paused for a moment, letting the relief settle in.

"...Okay, so how are we gonna do this?"

* * *

Later that afternoon, you were sat alone on your couch, waiting for Papyrus to pick up his phone.

Ring ring... ring ring... Come on, Pap...

"H-hello! Friend! H-how are yo- _Mettaton, p-please_... How are you?"

He sounded pretty flustered.

"Uh, yeah, I'm good! I just wanted to let you know that-"

"Ah! Please, dear, I'm trying to talk to-" His speaking was cut short, and the sound of metal on bone could be heard.

"More kisses for my sweet skeleton~" sounded Mettaton's voice faintly in the background.

" _A-a-a-ah, n-not now, please_. I'm trying to- oh, y-yes! Friend! How can I help you?"

"Uh... So, I just wanted to let you know that me and Sans are, uh, breaking up. Thought you might be interested in knowing."

The metal-and-bone sound reverberated down the phone a few more times as you spoke.

"Oh, s-so sorry - could you repeat that? I'm... having some problems with focusing... Many apologies..."

Clink clink.

"Sans and I are splitting up, and we thought you might want to know." you repeated a little louder.

"O-oh! Uh, that's..." Clink. "...That's l-lovely!" Clink. "Well, I... I must be going! I shall speak to you soo- _M-Mettaton, honey_... uh, soon, friend! Goodbye!" Clink.

He hung up before you could respond.

...

That went even better than you'd hoped!

You went through your contacts once more, looking for Sans this time, and called him. He responded far quicker than his... distracted... brother.

"Dude!" you exclaimed when the skeleton picked up.

"It went well?"

"Hell yeah!"

"Oh, thank fuck for that." he said, chuckling. "Aw, man. Freedom. Amazing."

"I know, right?" you responded, slightly giddy with glee.

The charade was over after so long. Or what felt like so long. You didn't know anymore. You were just glad to not have Papyrus breathing down your necks anymore.

"Hey, wanna come over to play some videogames or something? To celebrate or whatever?"

"Please, yes." Sans groaned. "Grillby's saying he's gonna close up in a few minutes, and judging from what I saw of my brother and the robot for like a minute before I bailed right out of there, I don't wanna be heading home for a while."

"Alright, see you soon then?"

"Absolutely."

"One final 'date', huh?"

"Heh, yeah, sure. Sounds great."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tysm for the support on this fic I <3 u guys  
> I've got maybe 3-ish chapters left in me for this fic? so yeah. I mean who knows - I only planned for this to be like 6/7-ish chapters and here we are on ch8 and going strong.  
> hope you all enjoyed this chapter! I sure had fun writing the bits with MTT, even if it wasn't much haha  
> speaking of, sorry this one's short. there are reasons, trust me.  
> again tyvm - for my first fic that I showed anyone since my... deviantart days *shudders*... it's been amazing how much the reaction exceeded my expectations! (then again that's not too hard lmao like I expected nothing of anything)  
> <3  
>   
>   
> (also does anyone spot the Miley Cyrus reference. the me from like 6/7 years ago would be so proud)  
> 


	9. The Aftermath of the Fakeup

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Papyrus and Alphys react fully to the "breakup". Also you and Sans watch TV for a little while iunno

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> frick  
> I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while and also that this chapter's p. short but I tried and that's what matters, right? yeah!!!!!  
> but yeah life got in the way, as did the general way I am as a human being. that meaning every time I went to write I was like "yeah I can do this!!" and 20 seconds later clicked away to yt videos I've seen 7000 times  
> anyways I struggled a little (a bit more than a little) with this chapter and I wanted to do things slightly differently but NOPE I've decided to move the plot the teensiest bit faster than I wanted. not much but oh well lmao it's something.  
> this chapter's dumb & bad pls enjoy

Freedom at last.

Sweet, sweet freedom.

Freedom from Papyrus and his insistence on his brother being your boyfriend and the two of you going on so many numerous dates.

Freedom to be the good friends, best friends, that you were, and nothing more.

Freedom thanks to Mettaton, who managed to distract the tall skeleton enough so that he'd lose any and all interest in your apparent "relationship".

Glorious freedom from Paps' overbearingness.

...

Freedom that was short-lived.

As soon as the initial excitement of dating the superstar wore off (but certainly not the love and adoration), Papyrus had a sudden moment of clarity.

You two... broke up?

After all his effort and hard work? After all the affection you'd displayed for one another? After you'd both proved him right in that you were a perfect couple?

It was all too painful for him, and he was only an outsider to the dating!

Never would either of you find a better romantic match! It was so tragic - that you would never see the extent of where your relationship could have gone, that you'd given up so easily after just a short while... that he wouldn't attend and be best man at the hypothetical wedding for you two that he'd thoroughly planned out in his head, ready to put into action at any moment, should the time come...

Despite his many issues with your breakup related to his hard work and effort to find the perfect match for his brother and setting you up together, though, a great majority of his sadness was _for_ you, not _at_ you.

He'd really taken it hard.

And so, for the moment, you were stuck on the phone with a bawling skeleton on the other end.

"I just don't understand!" he blubbered. "You were so good together! And you gave up on eachother after such a short while!"

"Yeah, yes, ok, Pap, I get it, just..." You sighed. "We keep telling you the same things over and over. We're just not into eachother like that!"

"B-but-"

"Papyrus, please. Enough. We're friends. That's it. I'm glad you wanted to try and help your brother, but it's just not going to happen."

"I..."

He paused for a moment, then you heard him sniff.

"...Ok then. I will stop. I'm sorry."

"It's alright, Pap. It's nice to know you care a lot, but you just, uh, need to tone it down. A lot. It's just tiring, you see?"

"Yes. I understand. I-" His voice was cut off by the sound of a knock at the door. "Oh, there's someone at the door. Excuse me, friend, I must- METTATON! IT'S METTATON! OH, OH, I SHALL SPEAK TO YOU LATER, GOODBYE-"

The phone call ended abruptly before you could say goodbye yourself.

Your upset melted away in seconds. He really could be adorable - when he wasn't figuratively trying to smash your lips against Sans' teeth, at least.

Thank god for Mettaton, who would help soften the blow of the realisation that had hit Papyrus.

Unfortunately, he couldn't soften it enough.

* * *

Days passed, and the news of the parting travelled to your friends. None of whom really cared. Undyne, particularly, being the only one (or, at least, the only one you knew of) who knew the truth.

Over those days, Papyrus cried. A good few times. At some point, he turned to Alphys to let out his emotions to, who in turn came to you with messages containing questions galore about her sinking ship.

{But you two were adorable together!!!}

[Alphys please don't make me explain this YET ANOTHER TIME]

[lemme tell you, Papyrus has been DRAINING these past few days]

{But my ship :( }

[you do know your ship being canon was fake right?]

[it was all a ruse]

{Wait, what?}

[we weren't actually dating]

{???}

{But whyyy?}

{And why did you not let me in on it? :C }

[we thought it would get Papyrus to stop bugging us]

[look how that turned out lmao]

[and to answer your second question, you were having too much fun with the idea. didn't wanna ruin the magic for you haha]

{Well, alright then}

{Oh, hey, gotta go, new episode of MMKC's about to start}

[alrighty]

[ttyl]

{^_^}

* * *

More days passed. Papyrus calmed down... ish? The pestering died down, at least. And the crying. Mostly the crying. The pestering continued. You soon got used to it, though, and it became less of an annoyance, and more of a regular occurrence in which he'd ask you if you were "certain. Super duper certain. Absolutely certain you're not interested in dating each other. Please. Please won't you try it again."

You simply rolled with it and responded with a dismissive "Yes. Yes. Yes. Nope" each time.

Sans, however, only grew increasingly annoyed with time. Increasingly, quietly annoyed. And alongside the silent frustration he seemed more frequently deep in thought. You couldn't help but worry a little.

"Hey, you ok there, Sans?" you questioned one day, concerned.

"Huh- uh, what?" Sans jolted in his seat, back to reality after having zoned out while you were watching game shows.

"You keep doing that. Just like, not paying attention to things. That's not really like you, dude."

"Oh, I... Nah, I'm ok. Just been considering some things." He shrugged.

You thought for a moment yourself. "They're not Pap related, are they?"

"Right on the nail, friendo."

"Ok then, well, what exactly are the things?"

He paused, then looked as though he were about to speak, then stopped again, then actually spoke.

"It's nothing. Just... mulling some stuff over, is all. Or like, it's nothing yet, at least. I don't know."

"What, you got another idea how to try and get Papyrus to give up on us?"

"...Maybe."

Ok, now you were really interested. "Can you tell me?

"I mean..." he paused again, scratching the back of his skull. "I'm not sure about this one. It might be really dumb. It might even set Papyrus off even more. But I just..."

He groaned in frustration.

"...Man, it's something, I guess. I love the guy with all my heart, and you know that,"

"Mhm."

"...but we've gotta get him to stop with all this me and you stuff that he won't shut up about."

You nodded in agreement, waiting for him to continue.

"So, anyway, this thing? I don't know, like I said, it could make the situation worse, but if there's a chance that we can get him to chill, I'm feeling ready to risk it."

"Well, whatever it is, it can't make him worse than he's been before, right? Now..." You leaned over to Sans, propping up your head on one hand and cocking an eyebrow in interest. "...what might the thing be?"

Sans took a deep breath, then turned to you fully, and you noticed the faintest of blue tints to his cheekbones.

"Well, what if we...uh... gave it a real go? Like, what if we tried actually dating?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you enjoyed <3 feel free to visit my tumblr to tell me how bad this chapter is lmao. berate me for my futile attempts at writing. I'm at lollyholly99 hmu
> 
> (but really I keep looking at this chapter and feeling it's so short and I'm getting Savlonic lyrics stuck in my head. and by lyrics I mean just the one and that is "short like a bungalow house" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA also it's bad. not the song I mean this chapter.)


	10. It Happens. (ft. Christmas Spirit.)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You make The Thing happen and go to a Christmas party later on. It's pretty fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok folks r u ready  
> also I know it's only like halfway-ish through November but the Christmas party was necessary for reasons bc I'm useless at making things happen lmao  
> time passing? just frickin say time passes. what else is there to it amirite. easy as heckie.

"I... You... what?" you asked, still processing Sans' words.

"I'm saying, what if we tried actually going out?"

You stared blankly at the skeleton for a good few moments, thinking, before speaking again. "You, uh..." You paused again. "...You're serious?"

"Yeah, I just, y'know, thought that if we really, honestly gave it a try, maybe Paps would leave us alone."

He shrugged.

"And yeah, I just kinda..." His voice trailed off, his eye sockets suddenly widening. "...oh, shit, no, not that I, uh, not that I like you like that or anything!" His face began turning blue. "No, god, we're just friends, but, uh... shit."

"...Ok, ok, yeah, don't worry, I believe you, dude, but... what exactly is the plan here?"

"Alright, so, this is what I'm thinking." he began again. "I think we can cut a deal with Paps. We give this a real go, give him what he wants, and in return, he doesn't say anything about this whole thing anymore."

"...hm."

"...So, what do you think?"

"Uh..." You paused. "Yeah, I think this could work!"

"So, you're down?"

"Uh, sure, I guess!"

"Well then..."

There was a silence that hung around for a good few moments before Sans spoke again.

"I guess I'm your boyfriend now?"

"Well, not until we get Papyrus to agree to the thing, right?"

"Right. Let's get on that, then."

* * *

 

"Alright. Papyrus, we need you to just listen to us for a second." you began, sitting Papyrus down next to you and Sans on the brothers' couch.

"Okay! I can do that!"

"Right. Thankyou."

You paused, looking over at Sans, who gave you a nod that you quickly returned, then turned back to Papyrus.

"Okay, so, you know our, uh, breakup? Mine and Sans'?"

His smile disappeared. "...Yes. Not so fondly."

"Well, how would you feel if I told you that, uh... we were never actually dating?"

Papyrus stared confusedly at you, not quite understanding your words. "Wh... What?"

"We faked the whole thing. We weren't really dating."

"...You weren't?"

"No. And I'm sorry we lied to you, Paps."

"That's ok, friend." He sighed, almost over-dramatically. "...But I do wish you would have truly gone through with it..."

"Well, that's what we're here to talk about." Sans finally piped up.

"Um... ok?" Papyrus responded, cocking his head in his mild confusion.

"We want to make a deal, bro."

"...And what might that be?"

"Well, here's the proposal."

"Proposal?! You're getting married?!" Papyrus exclaimed, almost leaping from his seat.

"N-no, Pap. Please sit back down. And just... let us talk through this quickly? Please?"

He complied, and you spoke again.

"Ok, so here's the deal. We'll go ahead and... give a real relationship a try... and you don't freak out about it. You don't get in our faces, you don't arrange our dates, you just leave us to it."

"That sound like an idea you're into, bro?" Sans continued. "You get your 'perfect match' or whatever, and we don't have to worry about being hounded about said match every time we see you, and- Paps, oh god no."

Papyrus was practically vibrating in his seat, quaking with the sheer energy that you knew he had in those bones of his, a huge grin on his face, and translucent orange tears gathering at the corners of his eye sockets.

He looked back and forth between the two of you through his welling tears before enthusiastically extending a hand to shake.

"I agree to the terms wholeheartedly!"

You shook his hand, and it wasn't long before he retracted his arm and jumped back up from his spot on the couch.

"Goodness! I have to go and tell Alphys! She'll be so happy!" He had bounded out of the room and up the stairs before you could react.

Seconds later, you heard his bedroom door closing, a quick dial tone, and then a loud yelling about what had just transpired.

"Welp." Sans began, closing his eyes and leaning back in his seat. "At least he won't be like that around us now, right?"

"Right..." you responded, somewhat nervously. "I suppose."

Sans didn't hear. He'd fallen asleep. His slumbering skills never failed to impress you.

Well, hell, why not take the opportunity as well?

In minutes, you'd joined him in your couple's couch nap.

* * *

Time passed, with nothing particularly interesting happening. You and Sans were just the friends that you'd been before. You hung out as usual, made jokes as you did, showed the platonic affection for each other that you usually did - just regular stuff. Every so often there would be moments of awkwardness, moments of tension, but for the most part you managed to avoid them.

Christmas rolled around pretty soon.

* * *

The skelebros were holding a Christmas party, that you were of course invited to.

You hadn't expected monsters to be familiar with the holiday, but before you could even mention the tradition, Papyrus was (naturally) already all over it. The skeletons' house was covered from top to bottom in decorations, lovingly placed around by the taller of the two. Their stockings were hung far in advance - Papyrus' enthusiasm for Santa's eminent visit was sweet as anything.

You arrived at the overly decorated house on the date of the party - fashionably late, because that's just how you rolled - and were greeted by Papyrus at the door, clad in a horrible, sickly green jumper with a snowman on the front.

"Oh! Hello! I'm so glad you came!" he exclaimed.

"Hey, Papyrus! How's it going?"

"Very well, thankyou! Oh, oh! Please, do come in!"

When you stepped in after him, he turned away, signalling for you to wait a moment, before shouting up the stairs.

"Sans! Your datemate is here! It's time to actually join the party!"

There was no response from the stairway. You only heard the hustle and bustle of the party in the background - classic Christmas tunes playing, Undyne threatening to suplex someone, Mettaton showing off and modelling his glittery Santa hat and soaking up any and all attention - mostly the usual sort of thing, but with more Christmas spirit.

"Sans!" Papyrus repeated.

When there was no response, he disappeared up the stairs. He returned moments later, carrying a tired Sans - complete with Christmas patterned hoodie - under his arm.

"Honestly, how can you even sleep at a time like this? There's a party going on, that we've been planning,"

"That you've been planning, really." Sans yawned.

"And you're not even there!" Papyrus finished, taking no note of Sans' comment. "Now, it's time for you to be a decent boyfriend and hang out with your lovely datemate at the party!"

He plonked Sans down in front of you before speaking again. "Now, I myself am going to go see my boyfriend. Have fun at the party you two!"

Then, just like that, he was gone, rushing over to Mettaton, waving and calling to him. You saw them disappear into the back garden and then they were out of sight.

And then there was silence between you and Sans. Silence, apart from the sound of the party and Jingle Bell Rock beginning to play in the background.

"...So." Sans said at last, after a good 15 seconds of standing there at the bottom of the stairs.

"So." You repeated.

"You wanna hang out at the party with everyone, or..."

"I mean, that's what I'm here for, right?"

"Uh, yeah. Right."

He chuckled.

"Well then." He tilted his head towards you jovially. "Shall we?"

"Yeah. Let's go." You smiled back at him, and you both headed off to the living room, where the party was in full swing.

Sans motioned towards the sofa, to which you nodded back, and you sat down next to each other, neither of you too interested in actually doing anything at the moment.

"So, uh. Neat party, huh?" you asked, making some kind of conversation.

"Yeah. Paps put a lot of work into this. The guy can't get enough Christmas when the time comes around, I swear." Sans replied.

"So, hey, is Christmas the same for monsters as it is for humans? Like, this is the first one you've spent up here on the surface - have you noticed any differences or anything? To an underground Christmas, I mean. Because this looks pretty familiar to me."

"Actually, we had it pretty much the same in the underground. I guess in terms of the way we celebrate stuff, we kinda... evolved in tandem with each other, huh?"

"I guess so. You think that's anything to do with all the stuff that fell in that dump? In, uh, whatsit... the Waterfall?"

"I mean, maybe. Sounds pretty plausible." He leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes, getting comfortable. "But yeah, there were a few things that were new to us monsters. Nothing too huge."

"Like what?" you questioned.

"Hmm... Like..." He opened his eyes again, looking up at the ceiling. His eye sockets grew wider, his pupils growing smaller and his grin melting slightly as he saw something. His eyes went back to normal after a moment - normal, but a little vexed. "...Are you actually kidding me right now."

He sighed. "Like that."

You moved your gaze upwards to where Sans was looking.

Mistletoe, hung from the ceiling, just above where you were sitting.

"Oh, mistletoe? Yeah, I guess you guys wouldn't get too many sprigs of this down there. Still, with, like, all of the human media that fell down there, I would've thought you'd known about it."

"...The point of it's that we have to kiss under it, don't we?"

"Well, not necessarily. You don't have to, it's just a bit of fun, y'know?"

"Oh thank god." Sans sighed, sliding lower in his seat.

"Hey, are you thirsty or anything? I think I'm gonna go get a drink. And maybe dig in to some of those mini sandwiches before they're go-"

"Hey everybody!" You were interrupted by Undyne. Shouting, of course. "Look who's found themselves under that misty-foot thing!" She was pointing directly at you and Sans. He jumped upon seeing the finger pointed at you two, sitting back up, his face beginning to heat up and turn blue. Yours started turning red similarly.

"Oh Christ." you both exclaimed, almost in sync.

Some of the party goers began to turn to look at you, curious as to who it could be. The crowd started playfully cheering you on as Undyne spoke (bellowed, really) again.

"Hey! What're you waiting for, punks? Aren't you two gonna kiss?"

A chant of "Do it, do it, do it, do it," and then "Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss," spread across some of the crowd.

Thanks, Undyne.

You and Sans looked at each other, then at the crowd, then at each other again.

The chanting only grew in intensity.

Sans took a deep breath and sighed. Then he shrugged. You immediately knew how things were going to happen at that point. And that was ok.

"Fuck it, right?" he said, smiling nervously.

"Right." you responded, along with a mirrored nervous smile.

Before you knew it, Sans had pressed his teeth to your lips, his hand on your shoulder to pull you closer.

The small crowd cheered around you - Undyne doing so the loudest. Within the sound could just barely be heard a small "My OTP!" from Alphys over to the side of the room.

You leaned into the kiss for another moment or two before pulling away again.

Then the guests went back to what they were doing before, Undyne and Alphys included, as if nothing had happened. You and Sans, meanwhile, sat as you had been sitting before, staring at the floor in front of you.

"...Well, uh... That was... Actually kinda..." his voice trailed off.

"...Nice?" you finished for him.

"...Yeah... yeah, it... I... Yeah."

"Yeah, same here..." You couldn't really deny it.

After more seconds of silence, you both began laughing. Giggling to yourselves, both knowing, both kind of amused and confused and bewildered all at the same time and laughing, as if one of you had just told one of your worse jokes.

All the tension disappeared. Any and all scraps of it, gone. There was a kind of freedom in the feeling that fueled the laughter. Freedom from the awkwardness, freedom from hiding anything, freedom to admit to yourself that dating Sans... might not be such a bad idea.

"So," Sans began, both of your laughter calming down. "Wanna... do that again sometime?"

"Hmm," You pretended to ponder to yourself. "Yeah, I think I can find the time to fit that in somewhere."

The two of you laughed again, loud, happy, genuinely amused and all.

Then, at that moment, Papyrus was back from the garden.

"Papyrus, oh my god, you missed it!" Undyne yelled.

"Missed what?" he responded, confused.

Her only response was her pointing at the mistletoe above you. Papyrus got the message.

"Oh my god, no!" he exclaimed. "How could this have happened?!" He dropped to his knees. "The one time I leave the room, and I miss it!"

You and Sans chuckled to each other once more.

"So, uh, as I was saying earlier..." you began.

"Oh, right, yeah." Sans responded.

"I'm gonna get a drink. You want one?"

"Sounds good."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> again sorry about the early christmasness but heck you guys got a smooch out of it so like. that's good, right??????? listen I needed the mistletoe you gotta understanD  
> hope you liked the chapter <3  
> I've got like one more chapter of this fic left in me? and it's gonna be an epilogue kinda thing.  
> so this is kind of the end? but not really? *shrugs*  
> love u guys ty for reading <333


	11. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some time has passed. Things are good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well here it is it's the end  
> v sorry it's super short & bad  
> I feel like I rushed this? probably? I kind of want to move on to other projects but ANYWAY hope u like this last chapter guys <3 ty for reading

Some people say something about the person you date - or was it the person you marry... Whatever. Something about that they should be your best friend.

You didn't know you'd ever take it so literally.

And now, you were cuddled up on the sofa with sans, both of you immersed in something to read, enjoying eachother's warmth and company. You, with a fantasy novel, and Sans, with some book on physics. Somehow, you hadn't even known how deep his interest in science was until you'd started dating. One more thing on the growing list of things you were learning about one another in your time together.

Since that first kiss at the brothers' christmas party, the two of you had found yourselves developing a genuine attraction to eachother. Pretty soon, you were going on actual dates (organised by you, of course - Papyrus stuck by his word and stayed out of it), acting more like a couple out in public, and even going as scandalously far as... well, just kisses, for the time being. And lots of cuddling. Sans ended up using you as a pillow many a time. As he kind of was now.

All of a sudden, the front door was being opened, the calm silence broken by Papyrus' return home from hanging out with Undyne, prompting Sans to jump in surprise.

You couldn't help but giggle at the cute action - and... had he been drifting off, again?

"Hello! I'm back, everybody!" Papyrus called from the hallway.

"Heya, Paps!" you and Sans responded, almost in unison, mostly undistracted from your reading material.

"I assume you two have been ok while I've been gone!" Papyrus continued, making his way through the living room. He paused a moment. "Why, you two haven't moved an inch since I left!"

"You'd be wrong there, bro." Sans said, not really looking up from his book.

"Eh?"

"We got snacks a little after you left." you clarified.

"Well, that's still not a lot of getting up and doing things..." Papyrus grumbled, before perking up again. "Oh! Speaking of food, I think it's about time I got dinner started for us, yes?"

"Actually... you might just be cooking for yourself tonight, Pap." Sans piped up.

"...What?"

"Oh, uh," You looked up from your book to explain. "We were planning to go out for dinner! Me and Sans, that is. To that new place on the other side of town!"

Papyrus was still for a moment, then tilted his head like a confused puppy. "...Like... a date?"

"Well..." You shrugged. "Yeah, it kinda is!"

"A date of your own volition?"

"Yep. Sans and I planned this by ourselves."

"Heh, we didn't have to be harassed into it this time, huh, Paps?" Sans added.

Papyrus was silent.

Then, after a few moments, his confused face changed to that of a smirk. He put his hands on his hips and leaned closer to the two of you, a small chuckle of "Nyeh heh heh" escaping him.

"I told you so."

You recoiled a little at his statement and the sudden invasion of personal space. "W-what?"

He stood up straight again, prideful yet excited as ever, before talking again. "All that time ago, when I came to your door, what did I say?"

"Uhh," You paused to think. "Something, something, 'date my brother'?"

"Well, yes, that, but the other thing!"

Sans put his book down on his chest, joining in the conversation properly. "What other thing might that be, Paps?"

"That you two would be brilliant together! And that you," He pointed at you. "would be able to get Sans out and about more! And just look at you!" He gestured to the both of you now. "You look adorable! And you've even gotten started on the whole 'getting Sans out of the house every once and a while and doing things' thing with the 'going out to dinner' thing!"

The two of you both dropped your books in surprise when Papyrus picked you both up with ease and hugged you tightly.

"Gosh, I'm just so happy for you two!" he added, placing you back down.

"Heh, we're happy for you, too, bro." Sans chuckled.

Papyrus laughed a few gleeful giggles that trailed off soon enough. "Hmm..." he hummed, now pondering something. "I did want to try a new recipe I found for dinner tonight, though, and I especially wanted to share it with you guys!" He sighed. "It'll be such a shame to have to wait for another day!"

"You can have Mettaton round while we're out, if you want. I'm sure he'd be happy to taste it." Sans offered.

"Oh my god! Really?"

"Yeah, just don't cause any mayhem. And if you do, please stay away from the glitter? I'm still finding sparkles in the coffee after last time."

"Okay! Oh, I'll go call him now!"

As Papyrus rushed upstairs, you checked the time. "Oh, hey, the restaurant opens up in a couple of minutes. You wanna start getting ready to head out? Y'know, get there before it gets too crowded? Get a nice table?"

Sans closed his book and stretched.

"Yeah, sounds good."

* * *

Man, what a good meal. And some bad laughs along the way. Awesome. Dessert would be coming along soon enough - some kind of chocolate cake for the both of you. You probably should have read the menu in a bit more detail.

"So, uh. This has been nice, huh?" Sans finally piped up out of the silence between you.

"Yeah, I feel you there. I've had fun!" you responded.

"Hm. Y'know, I'm... I'm kinda glad we did this."

"Yeah, same here! I really didn't want to have to taste test that first attempt at whatever dish Papyrus plans on trying out tonight. And the food here is so good!"

"Uh... What?"

"This, uh, date! Or whatever. It's been a good time, right?"

"I... uh... that's not... what I meant." Sans' face began turning blue as he spoke.

You looked at him in confusion. "What?"

"I mean, this whole thing, y'know? Giving dating a chance, being datemates, all that. I'm glad we did it."

"Oh, uh..." You paused, taken aback slightly.

"Uh, sorry. That kinda came out of nowhere, huh?"

"No, no, it's okay! I mean, it was a little unexpected, but I feel the same way!"

"Oh thank god. I thought I made our dinner weird for a second there."

"No, nah, it's cool, it's cool."

The waitress arrived with your dessert. Chocolate lava cake. Nice. You thanked her, and she went on her way again.

"So... anyway... We didn't screw up, right? We're both agreeing on that? Our, uh, change in relationship hasn't been a mistake?" Sans questioned.

You giggled. "Yeah, no, this has been great! To be honest, I didn't think this would work out, 'cause we're... we were just friends and all, y'know?"

You paused, digging your spoon into the cake, watching intently as chocolate flowed from the newly created cracks.

"I know what you mean." said Sans. "I felt the same. But now? I... I love you. Really, I do. And not even, like, just as a friend."

"Yeah... I love you too, Sans..."

You smiled at him, and he smiled back, your cheeks turning red as his cheekbones turned blue-er similarly.

When your gaze dropped from his, he leaned over the table and kissed you.

After another moment, he broke the kiss, and you both laughed.

Then you finally brought your spoonful of cake up to your mouth.

It tasted pretty darn good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow. holy heck. my first big finished fic.  
> Honestly though thankyou to all of you for reading and giving me feedback and... 256 kudos as of writing this _what_the_shit_ how?? how did I do that???  
> This was my first fic that I've shared with anyone since my deviantart days and my garbage where I shipped myself with the Scout from TF2 (and boy what a MESS that was)  
> The support I've gotten for this fic is just. overwhelming. like, I expected to post the first chapter and get a flood of "wtf?? 0/10 get off ao3" but it was completely the opposite! And I feel so loved and I'm actually happy with my writing for the first time in forever and I'm so excited to share more with you guys! I'm kind of sad to be moving on from this one (as are a few of you from what I can tell from your comments haha) but I'm also super glad that I can throw the rest of my trash fic ideas at you! :D  
> But really thankyou to everybody. like so much. Really, this has been so cool and fun, and I can't wait to get even more writing done. C:
> 
> oh god I've been rambling aaaaaaaaaaaa
> 
> anyways again sorry for the length but this is like. all I could squeeze out of an ending for this fic. sorry if it's dumb but *shrugs* I tried I guess.  
> hmu at my tumblr (lollyholly99) if u wanna scream at me for being useless B)
> 
> <3


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